TOKYOMANGO

White-gloved Super Shuttle man.

I am flying on an airplane today!

Last time I flew was to go to New York City. I took Super Shuttle to the airport. A middle aged Japanese man got on at the downtown Sheraton. I thought he was funny because he put on white gloves every time he had to carry his suitcases on and off the shuttle. To protect his hands from getting calloused, maybe? Or to protect his suitcase from getting grimy?

I might never find out the answer. Unless, by some miracle, he is on my Super Shuttle again today. You just never know.

This penguin does not have coprophobia.

I keep trying to get off the poo theme, but then I'll come across something like a penguin with a giant turd for a head. So cool! And then I realize that as long as I'm blogging about Japan, I will always be blogging intermittently about poo.

Dear Squeamish Readers,

I'm sorry about the too-frequent-for-comfort poo references. I hope it doesn't deter you from visiting my site for non-poo-related tidbits from Japan. Perhaps you should try to overcome your coprophobia (medical term for fear of feces) by buying this wonderful prop at a Halloween store near you.

Reach enlightenment in just seconds.

Meditating is hard. I've tried everything from those fluffy self-awareness classes taught by white women with long hair in Berkeley to sitting on a little cushion reciting chants from a book while facing a wall in a traditional Soto Zen Buddhist temple in Nishi Azabu. Today, I still cannot sit still for more than a few minutes unless I'm in an airplane. So I had to find another way to reach enlightenment, and this is what I found. A Buddha mask that will immediately make you look stone cold, statuesque, and...meditative.

OOOOHHHMMMMMM......

Male gals get their day in the sun

You can uncross your fingers now, pretty boys. Gal fashion is now readily available for men who like to dress in racy thongs and t-shirts with bad English on them on an entire floor of the infamous gal department store, 109-2. Hundreds of boys flocked the shops on its opening day. Hooray, now you can be a Gyaru-o, too!

I think it's great how consumerism in Japan embraces niche cultures just as much as the mainstream. Otakus and cross-dressers in America are screaming for the same avenues of legitimacy that their Japanese counterparts now have. But all they've got is Wired Magazine and the Folsom Street Fair. And MySpace.

(Full story and photo courtesy of Mainichi Daily News.)

The story of Professor Grope-a-lot

A fifty-something year old teacher was fired today, mostly because he's fucked up in the head and has severly impaired judgment. When a student of his requested a private meeting, he took it as an invitation to stick his tongue in her mouth, shove his hand in her blouse, and lift up her skirt. "I thought she liked me because I had 13 private lessons with her over the summer," he said.

Mr. Private Teacher Man, are you okay in the head? Since when does "Please take a look at my homework" mean "Please take a look at my panties?"