TOKYOMANGO

Blue Chihuahua Trend Spawns Lots of Genetic Defects

This is an old NY Times article, but I just had to shed light on this blue Chihuahua issue. To get smaller, cuter, and rarer dogs, backyard breeders in Japan are doing screwed up things like mating dogs repeatedly with their own offspring to make rare recessive traits show up more often. Pictured here is one of these blue-tinged chihuahuas that were so very trendy a couple years ago. People paid up to $10,000 for these. And of course, horror stories that come with excessive in-breeding abound: some of these pups have brain disorders that make them just run in circles all day, and others had "bones so frail they dissolved in their bodies." Apparently, genetic defects in dogs are 4x more common in Japan in the US or Europe.

Good thing Ruby's a red minpin, not a blue chihuahua.

Link (Thanks, Brian!)

Candid Photos of Godzilla with his Friends

This rare snapshot of Godzilla circa 1955 shows the not-so-giant monster getting ready for a shoot.

Link

Giant Subterranean Bicycle Parking Lot (Video)

Check out this amazing new bicycle parking lot near Kasai Station in Tokyo. It houses up to 9,400 bicycles in a giant subterranean vault 15 meters deep. You put your bike on a platform; seconds later, an elevator opens up and a robotic arm jumps out and pulls your bicycle in, taking it down into the lot's cylindrical dungeon. It looks like it would be a hassle and a total waste of time, but the reporter timed the whole operation, and it took only 23 seconds for the machine to identify, collect, and return his bicycle.

via Treehugger

My Below-the-Belt Prank Tutorial

I can't emphasize how much significance below-the-belt jokes play in Japanese humor. In America, they are often perceived as unnecessarily vulgar, or as a cheap way to spice up an otherwise stale joke. Not in Japan. Shimoneta are an integral part of the culture, without which the country will probably be overrun by robots.

Another critical element of interpersonal relationships in Japan is the below-the-belt PRANK. (No, not pantsing. That's way too simple and benign.) Today, let me introduce you to two of the most popular variations, one of which is displayed in the Doritos bag on your right.

Annual Festival Honors Penises and Fertility

The annual Honen festival was held on Saturday in Komaki, near Nagoya, where people celebrate fertility and good harvest by carrying around a giant penis. Shinto priests played music while the crowd got drunk on all-you-can-drink sake and ate penis-shaped foods, like hot dogs.

Link (Thanks, Jason!)

New Mascot for Nara Heijo-kyo Anniversary

The city of Nara is preparing for the 1300th anniversary of the establishment of Heijo-kyo, the capital of Japan during much of the Nara period (710-794). To commemorate, they accepted numerous proposals for an official mascot and chose this fantastically preposterous illustration of a young monk with antlers. (Deer have become a symbol for the city.) Blogs and forums like 2ch are abuzz with incredulous reactions to this mascot, which is creeping out most and even offending some, who have started a petition to annul this abomination.

Some are having fun with it, like with this playful parody, but others are being used to scare babies in shopping malls. Picture after the jump...

Takarazuka Features Ms. Douglas MacArthur Musical

Takarazuka is a famous all-women's theatrical troupe that's been putting on lavish Broadway-like productions since 1913. Most of their productions are adaptations of Western classics—in the past, they've done everything from West Side Story to The Great Gatsby to The Sound of Music. The current feature, though, is something a little bit different—it's a romantic musical about Douglas MacArthur.

I'm really curious how they portrayed him—the "Supreme Commander"—best known for leading the US occupation in Japan after WW2—is known by some as the great leader who reconstructed Japan, and by others as the guy who exonerated the emperor from guilt and instead turned Japan into the US' puppy dog.

via J-List (Thanks, Baker!)

 

Tokyomango Blocked in China!

Is your blog blocked in China? Mine is. A friend is in Shanghai for work this month, and he just told me so on gchat. (I guess gmail is not blocked.) Hmmm. We all know that China has a massive firewall, and that the Great Firewall is kinda patchy and not very consistent and hackers are always trying to figure out how to get around it, but I wonder if there's anything you can do about individual blogs being blocked. Ideas?

I Fought Gamera and Won

I ran into Gamera the other day, so I decided to fight him. He weights a lot more than I do, and his arms are a lot thicker, so I just stood there screamed in his face. I knew he could only blow flames from his legs so as long as he stayed on his stupid wooden platform I knew I would win.

"I thought you're supposed to be able to fly," I said.
"GAOOOOO," Gamera replied.

People Squeezing into an Elevator

These people really want to catch this elevator going down to the Tsukuba Express platform in Akihabara. You'd think they'd give up because they obviously won't fit—but in Japan, we're really good at fitting more than the human eye may deem possible into really small spaces. This scene was a good portrayal of this concept, so I snapped this photo.

Japan Needs a New National Anthem

Nobuo Uematsu, composer of the Final Fantasy theme song, thinks Super Mario Bros should be Japan's new national anthem. As much as I love Mario, I have to disagree. First of all, Mario is Italian. How could a song about an Italian represent Japan? Second of all, the Mario song is fun and exciting, but it doesn't have the "for the land of the free" climax moment that, say, the US national anthem has. We need that. Obviously, the current song, Kimigayo, isn't really cutting it. I think the government should hold a contest. There are so many talented musicians out there right now, I bet Ryuichi Sakamoto or Cornelius could whip up a better one in a few hours.

1up via Boing Boing (Thanks, Brian!)

Dried Sardines: A Sexy Alternative to V-Day

 

Got a flyer in Akiba telling me that Feb 14 is actually Dried Sardine Day, not Valentine's Day. An excerpt from the sensible flyer:

These days, the utter disregard of the people of Japan towards dried sardines is finally being recognized. Women give me cacao bean products during this time, taking out massive loans with 200% interest to give the now-popular "triple return" to their men.

Dried sardines ask for neither this triple return nor the heartbreak suffered when you don't get one.

The captions under the different dried sardine body parts are explaining how sexy and seductive a dried sardine is—slim legs, curvy body line, piercing eyes.

My Last-Day-In-Tokyo Combini Binge

On every last day before I leave Tokyo, I stop by Meguro Station and go to three places: the bookstore, MUJI, and the local convenience store. Today, I bought a book for Brian, some swag at MUJI, and the stuff pictured above at the combini. Here's a quick explanation of each awesome snack shown above (clockwise, from top right):

- Koeda chocolates. Yum yum crunchy sticks of chocolate and almond fun. Like most things Japanese, it comes neatly packaged in 12 little packets inside a rectangular red box.
- Aloe Yogurt. This will change your view of yogurt forever. It has aloe-flavored little jello thingys inside.
- 3 Bikkuriman snacks. If you were a kid in the late 80s in Japan, you'll remember how incredibly popular these things were. Each packet of wafered chocolate comes with a Bikkuriman card.
- GABA: The chocolate for the stressed out workaholic. This will end up being a gift.
- Meiji Rich Strawberry chocolate, made with 77% real strawberry fruit.
- Super soft steamed chocolate pudding. This is nothing like the jell-o fake pudding crap they sell in the US. You gotta try it.
- Pucchin pudding. The classic flan-in-a-plastic-cup. My brother loves this stuff.
- Tropicana grapefruit juice. I don't know why. I just wanted to drink something tangy.

I Was Forced to Watch a Morbid Video to Get My Driver's License Renewed

I went to get my Japanese drivers' license renewed yesterday. It took forever! Let me explain.

Japan, like the US, has a point system where you get penalized on your driver's license if you do something illegal. In the US, you get points for things like moving violations and drunk driving, but never for parking your insurance goes up. In Japan, you get points for everything including drunk driving and parking illegally, and they make you watch a morbid video when you're due for renewal.

I had two points on my license: one for parking on the street while I was getting a haircut, and once for turning left from a no turn lane. Plus I had inadvertently let my license expire because I live in the US and I wasn't here on my last birthday. So, after taking two different sets of ID photos, filling out some paperwork, and paying a bunch of money at ten different windows, I had to take a two hour class with the other delinquent drivers in a classroom on the third floor of the Samezu DMV.

How I Know If Someone's From Japan

How can you tell if one group in a crowd of hundreds is from your home country?  I was at a ski resort in Tahoe earlier today, taking a burger-and-chili-fries break, studying a Japanese family sitting at a table in front of me. They were far enough away that I couldn't hear what they were saying, but two tiny signs told me that they were Japanese, not Chinese or Korean.

Anyone who's been asked if they can tell the difference between the three dominant East Asian races has probably taken—or should take—the All Look Same quiz. It's really hard. I always score pretty badly on it. But that's because the biggest indicators of Japanese, Korean, or Chinese are not the facial features, but much more nuanced things like the way their jeans are tapered, or the way they ask for the bill at a restaurant.

Back to the family at the ski resort. It was a mom, a baby, a dad, and another younger woman, presumably an aunt. The dad was talking to the aunt while buckling his ski boots. At one point, he looked up from his boot-buckling and did a slight shake-of-the-head-nod type of thing. That gesture, albeit so small and subtle, was so Japanese! And then I looked over at the mom and the baby. The mom was holding the baby up to her face and talking to him. At one point, she did this thing where she gave the baby a little boost and made a facial expression that was so distinctly Japanese.

In this particular situation, I had very little else to go by. They were all wearing ski gear, which made clothing analysis obsolete, and I was too far away to tell what or how they were speaking. But I knew, because of these two little things.

If you have any stories about how you've been able to tell whether someone is from your home country/culture, please share!

Nasubi, the Naked Guy who Lived on Freebies for a Year

I totally forgot about Nasubi until this reminded me of the funny naked man with just a room and a video camera who had to write postcard after postcard to magazine giveaways in order to win food and provisions. Everyone in Japan watched him goof off, starve, and get random shit like celebrity calendars and a giant yellow tent. Nippon Television held an audition, Nasubi won, and he voluntarily entered into this room with the goal of raising a million yen within a year in free stuff. He even had to win food in order to survive—he wasn't allowed to bring anything in.

I don't necessarily buy into the morally outraged position that this person takes on the issue, but here's a pretty good recap of the show in its entirety. Yes, it's true that there are a lot of extreme prank TV shows in Japan. But this doesn't just happen to random people. In N. America, we have a gazillion reality shows in which aspiring celebrities whore themselves out to pain and suffering for their minutes of fame. This guy got a year and a half. I'm sure the producers of the show had a close eye on him to make sure he didn't really starve or die or have an irreparable mental breakdown.

Link 

Japanese Trains Are Great For Naps

I found a funny photo gallery of Japanese people sleeping in public.

It's true—Japanese people really can fall asleep anywhere. Maybe we're opportunistic sleepers, like dogs—sleeping whenever possible. Or maybe the trains are just too damn comfortable.